I’m a little bit sticky, kinda smelly and very cranky right now. I just spent 8 hours in the hot sun working as a Homeless Voice vendor which basically means, asking for donations.
I learned that we are not called panhandlers because we have to sign a contract to become independent contractors and we have to pay a portion of the donations to the shelter in exchange for our living expenses. There are no lazy people here. If you don’t “work” as a vendor, you don’t get to stay.
I did well. In fact, I did GREAT for my first time out the gate. I was a bit nervous to do well because I have the (mis)fortune of doing well at everything that I do and once the person I’m working for notices that then they will do anything to keep me aboard even sabotage any success I may have which may lead me away from their company. That annoys me and I find myself working less than my potential at times because of it.
I am learning so much about the homeless population. Most of it will surprise you simply because I’m finding that although a lot of the homeless have bad attitudes and perspectives on life, this isn’t a bad lifestyle to live.
At this shelter the residents are taken care of and we eat THREE hot meals a day. That astounds me because before coming here I NEVER ate 3 meals a day. Although there are no couches to lounge around on and there is a set bedtime and wake up time I’m really not struggling to eat or laugh.
The homeless population seem to be a bitter bunch that blame others for their situations but honestly, I have never met more giving and sweet people. What little they have, they ALWAYS share. ALWAYS.
I have been completely catered to and taken care of since I’ve been here. No man actually tries to hit on me, although at times they flirt. I don’t feel unsafe at all. It’s cool being able to meet someone new everyday and get to know them and their lives.
I dream of sleeping in a bed though. I dream of frolicking in my underwear with no bra on and taking a vacation with my sons. My spirits are often lifted when I make a new video or learn something that will help women to overcome their fear of homelessness. I am using this Project to help me get through this because I look at my situation as an assignment and not my destiny or my misfortune.
I would really love a nice hot shower and the ability to lounge around the house. I can’t believe I gave that all up. For what?
I really hope I hear from women who say that my journey has inspired them and allowed them to release their fears.
I do hope this isn’t all for nothing.