Childless by Choice: Lindsay’s Story

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Lindsay Aronstein, 35, is the owner of a women’s boutique in Houston, Texas. She has been married to Scott Aronstein, 38, for 6 years.

My parent’s were both married and had children from their previous marriages. I am their only child together and pretty much grew up as an only child. They have been happily married for 36 years. My parents will often tell me that little kids annoyed me at an early age. For example if a child were crying in a restaurant or in a store I would be easily annoyed. I did fantasize about having my own children but only wanted to have one if any.

Honestly most of my friends had children very quickly after they were married and I saw the influence it had on their lives and the impact it had on their marriages and I wasn’t sure I wanted that for my husband and I. We love to travel and spend time with our furkids (3 dogs) and we love that it is just the two of us! I read the book Two is Enough: A Couple’s Guide to LivingChildlessby Choice by Laura S. Scott and I knew then that we had made the best choice for us. Also the book No Kids: 40 Good Reasons Not to Have Children by Corinne Maier was such an eye openener! I didn’t feel alone after reading these books. My Mom and Dad also were very supportive and my Dad said “Not everyone has to have kids, you will be fine.”

My husband and I initially thought we wanted children, because that’s what you do, right? You’re supposed to get married and have a baby. So we tried naturally for a while and were told we would have to do IVF if we wanted children. At that point we decided absolutely not, and that really told us that honestly we really didn’t want them to begin with! It was meant to be and I am so glad it worked out the way it did! We have ZERO regrets!! We told our best friends and our families and they were more than supportive! It was tough at first because we are the minority. People wonder what’s wrong with you if you don’t have kids, or that you hate babies, or God forbid it’s just the two of you!

Yes people I really like my husband!

So after making our decision we traveled to Colorado on vacation for a week and the entire time we felt so free and happy. Of course I cried over the thought of never seeing a little Scott running around, but I got over it really quickly. We enjoyed discussing our future without kids and all of the things we would accomplish and all the places we would go!

We have many friends with children. They call us Aunt Lindsay and Uncle Scott. Just because we do not want children doesn’t mean we don’t adore our friends’ kids. We have an adorable niece who is 6 and she is our little buddy! She stays over and enjoys being with us no matter what. Our friends were very supportive of our decision and understand that we are so happy with it just being the two of us with our 3 dogs. My best friend actually told me she never could see the parent lifestyle for me and boy was she right!

I believe we gain so much by this lifestyle. We are able to be there for each other 100%! We are both self-employed and have time for our marriage. If we had children we wouldn’t be able to have all of that. We are able to travel, shop, eat and explore and only have to worry about each other. It’s really nice to not have the worries that our friends have, schools, colleges, paying for weddings, kids ending up hating you, etc. We do not have one regret about our decision.

We do a lot for our niece and enjoy her very much. Being an Aunt and Uncle works best for us! We enjoy being with our dogs and give a lot of support to different animal causes. We are a very generous couple with our time and when friends and family need us we are there for them. We often keep our niece for sleepovers so my sister n law and her husband can have a date night because Scott and I can’t imagine if we never had that alone time together!

 

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